Saturday, June 9, 2012

20 year high school reunion

Today is my 20 year high school reunion and I have chosen not to attend  just as I chose not to attend my 10 year.  I made this decision based on a few things. I do not want to go visit with people that I did not like then and probably won't like now.  They will have thinly veiled attempts at niceness and curiosity. If we were friends at some point then when we reconnected through Facebook and I invited you to get together why was I ignored? Also I do not need to hear people brag about all their success in life.  I feel like I wasted the last 20 years pursuing nothing. I have had more meaningless jobs than I would like to admit and have no idea any longer what a dream should or would look like.  

The one thing that I have done that was worth anything is bringing my children into this world. Anything that may fit into a success is backed by a failure.  I am divorced but recently remarried.  I had a stroke in January but am finding my way back. I have hit rock bottom more times than one person should have to, but now I stand at the top again, hoping like hell that the ground has finally stabilized. 

Maybe in another 20 years I will feel differently.


  1. i hope it's stabilized for you too. that's an awful lot to go through. i don't attend reunions either. i didn't have anything in common with most of the people in highschool. why would i want to go back and visit them?

  2. I am with you 100%. I have never gone to a high school reunion. For one thing, it would necessitate expensive travel. I am not interested in spending money to go out with people who ran in their own privileged circles back then. I have had success in life (by my own definition) but am not interested in comparing stories with the people who were part of a miserable time in my life. And, btw, I felt this way 21 years ago when I could have attended by 20th reunion and I still feel this way now. Maybe we need a non reunion reunion? Or is that simply a party?

  3. Sorry you've had such a rough time. Reunions are for the same people who were popular and successful in high school. Who needs 'em?

    Also, this part of your post struck a chord: "I feel like I wasted the last 20 years pursuing nothing. I have had more meaningless jobs than I would like to admit and have no idea any longer what a dream should or would look like. " Same here. I'm only now at age 31 realizing what I've always wanted to do--and hoping like hell that it's not too late. I don't have a job or a license, and I rely on other people waaay too much. My kids are really the only noteworthy accomplishment in my life; I'd better not screw them up! I definitely want them to believe in their dreams and not be deterred by anything so I'm trying to pursue mine.

    Here's to the next 20 years. May they be 20x better than the last 20!

  4. This reads like a list of fine achievements, so well done you! And life is too short to go to reunions, or anything else, that you don't want to.

  5. I hope that everything will get better. Were those 20 years really meaningless? Did you learn/grow during those years? I try not to regret anything because it has all shaped me into the person I am today. Everything can be a learning experience. I hope this helps.


  6. thank you all for your comments and support!

  7. You know, I totally agree with you on this. I keep thinking I'd love to go back to my high school reunion in eight years, but to be honest there were lots of kids at high school that I didn't like very much and didn't give me very fond memories! Although I can't possibly believe that you haven't accomplished have gone through a lot, but perhaps you have come out stronger after all of it. You seem to be a very caring person, and a great mom too. I think it's safe to say that you definitely have something to be proud of. :)

    By the way, I'm hosting an awesome blogfest and critique giveaway at my blog from June 22-24 that you should totally come participate in if you're interested! :) Hope you have a great day.

    ~Wendy Lu

    The Roarin' Twenties Poetry Blogfest + Chapter Critique Giveaway (hosted by The Red Angel)